Hubby Hopeless at massage? Honey, leave it to the professionals!

You don’t need a hubby to massage you:
Honey, you need a perinatal specialist!

 

Many women say to me “I told my partner to massage me, but he’s hopeless!” (And thank god he is – otherwise we would be out of a job!)
However, the beauty of seeing an experienced perinatal massage therapist is that we know there is more work to be done here than just massaging the sore spots.
You are only going to get frustrated with your man cos he can’t get the right spot – but honestly, why do you expect him to hold the knowledge of 20yrs of experience in the thumbs of his left and right hand. Unless he is spiritually gifted with the knowledge of a previous life, then you can be damn sure he is trying his best, but when he knows he can’t do it right because he works at a desk job and has no idea what to do with his hands and basically is scared of the T-Rex that might emerge when he is “doing it wrong”.

Your massage therapist is more than just a good pair of hands-  she is strong shoulders to
lean on, and a big heart to be nurtured from – use her.
She is waiting for you.

No Love, leave it to the professionals. We are the ones who can work with your body and support you every step of the way. Knowing how to position a pregnant body is one thing, but understanding why you are feeling the way you do (ie: why are the aches and pains there in the first place) and then knowing how to release them physically or emotionally is another thing altogether.

This is the reason a professional is required in pregnancy:

Let me speak a moment about using firm pressure in a massage during pregnancy. This is really my domain here. I believe that there is a huge opportunity here for the woman to learn how to breathe deeply whilst under pressure (if you have had a deep tissue massage before you will know what this is like!) I will teach you how to breathe in a way that transmutes the pain and helps it to ease away. I will teach you to not fear “pain” but to be able to recognise that the sensation of pain has many levels and that not all will actually be tremendously uncomfortable. The Good Pain. Do you know what I mean?

I choose to call it a sensation rather than pain, and often I will say that this is just a challenge point which means you can breathe through it. This kind of sensation awareness is invaluable for when you are in labour, because you will have already set up a pain/response cycle that involves deep breathing, and switching of the fear/retreat/panic response (which only causes more intensity of pain) and allows you to relax into the sensations.
We don’t push you though trigger points and follow the “no pain no gain” principle. Nor do we think a “fluffy” light-handed massage is going to do anything other than annoy the woman on the table. Let’s face it, when a therapist is moving their hands over that sore spot over and over again but …they…just….don’t…get…..into…it…OMG it is SOOOO frustrating. Right?

We sit somewhere in the middle of these two principles. We know the aches and pains and we know how to work with them – just firmly enough – to enable them to release. But if you have ever been to a Spa or a clinic that doesn’t specialise in pregnancy massage, you will be very familiar with their ”softly, softly” approach. But, maybe this is just what you need? So, we know how to adjust our pressure accordingly, it is never a one size fits all­ approach in our treatment rooms.

You can’t learn most of the stuff we do here at the clinic in a TAFE or a college. The work we do is based on research, theoretical questioning and then observations, testing and revising. That’s our point of difference. We have applied the training we have done, directly to our pregnant clients, and we see amazing results because we treat the whole person – mind, body and spirit.
Not only that, we will show you how to turn over in bed that will reduce discomfort, and we will show you how to use meditation and essential oils to ease symptoms and issues that crop up in each trimester.  

You are not losing your mind:

Sometimes during pregnancy you will feel like there will be a different emotional state seemingly every few hours! But don’t be alarmed, you are simply transitioning and learning how to be in a new role.

For now, you are the grower of a child, and this will challenge even the most stable woman. Learning how to process these strong emotions that come out of nowhere will also help you to release them so they don’t return as often, or at all.

 
Learning how to lean in to your massage therapist during these trimesters can be empowering and incredibly reassuring as you transition to motherhood. Hopefully your massage therapist has had a baby or three and can understand exactly where you are at, and empathise with you! It helps to know you aren’t going mad, and that your tears – as irrational as they may be – are perfectly acceptable in this moment.

 

Belle xx

Emotional Pain from IVF leads to physical pain

The world of IVF and assisted pregnancies leads to women needing a different kind of support from her natural health practitioner during this season of uncertainty.
For a woman travelling the road of questionable fertility it can be scary, anger inducing, devastating, and sucks the joy out of life (and sex to be honest.). To be micro-managed in the intimate layers of your life is humiliating, humbling and weirdly comforting all at different times. Having to ask for help is a hard pill to swallow and this alone can be the obstacle hardest to overcome.

Physical pain is usually the reason a woman will ask me to treat her in the early stages of pregnancy following a round of IVF, or after a miscarriage.

Low back pain, and upper back pain are usually the first two places that need assistance. Pain is known to steal the joy out of anyone’s life, but it can be even more acute and devastating for a woman who has previously miscarried. The first sign of pain may send fear signals all over her already stressed body. Pain will take a pregnant woman to the depths of despair as she is largely unable to control the outcome of her pregnancy. 

You might think the pain might be just physical in nature, however usually there are layers and layers of trapped emotions causing disruption to the lumbar area and to the neck and shoulders. 

So what are trapped emotions and why are they not spoken of more? Trapped emotions are simply the energy of emotions you have felt, perhaps long ago, or in more recent times that have become stuck in the physical tissues of the body. If you think about it, the feeling of being sad is a little different to feeling of grief..right? And feeling depressed is very different to the feeling of anger. Emotions are just energy and they all feel slightly different. Day to day you no doubt feel hundreds of different emotions in different circumstances. Most of the time the emotions rises up and then is released back into the mystery of where it came from. But sometimes it gets stuck…and this is when it starts to create havoc in the tissues of the body.

You may have heard of “muscle memory” – that mystical way a muscle will “remember” how to perform an action after a period of inaction. For instance, if you start a muscle building program again after a holiday, you will more quickly get back to where you were. 
Trapped Emotions are literally the “emotion memory” that hasn’t been fully released. And so you are more likely to get triggered over and over if you hold a trapped emotion. Have you ever lost it with rage to think “where on earth did that come from”? That is emotion memory that has been triggered. Have you ever felt like it was ground hog day with the same thing happening over and over again over a period of time? Or have you felt like everywhere you go you get ignored or jostled or pushed? This could be due to a trapped emotion or two being triggered.

Trapped emotions do more than just trigger angry outbursts though. They can also cause disharmony and imbalance in the physical body. They are also called “blockages” and can be a cause of illness, chronic conditions and inability to fall pregnant.
I have worked with countless women in the clinic who have been trying to fall pregnant for months or years, only to have one or two sessions with me and then “suddenly” they fall pregnant. A clear energy body leads to a harmonious physical body – don’t you think? 

In a world where women are surrounded with images and stories of how precious and joyful the nine or so months of pregnancy can be, it can impose guilt and strong negative feelings when a woman finds that she indeed does not like her pregnant state and longs for it to be over.

If you are somewhere along the fertility journey and are feeling like it is all weighing you down, and that there is hardly any joy in your life, then get in touch and we can have a chat about what you need. 
I can clear the emotions holding you back, weighing you down and stopping you from achieving your desires of the heart. 

Belle xxx

Safe Skin Care for Pregnancy & Breastfeeding

After a conversation with a pregnant mama the other day, I got to wondering how many other soon-to-be-mamas out there are wondering about skin care and the questionable ingredients contained in these little (expensive) bottles of goodness (or crap)???
I have had a romance with skin care since I completed my Beauty Consultancy diploma after dropping out of uni (double degree in Psych and Sociology – OMG my parents were not happy!) and then began working on counters in David Jones and Grace Bros for Clarins, Yves Saint Laurent, Calvin Klein and Face NY. (Yes, I did drop out of uni for this!) I had always been modelled exceptional skin care habits from my mum, and so I was easily able to share my personal and learned knowledge with women who hadn’t been fortunate enough to know the cleanse-tone-moisturise routine from an early age. (My mum has THE MOST BEAUTIFUL skin at the age of 70. I tell you, it is NEVER too late to start looking after your skin in an intentional and intelligent way.)

I thought I would share my thoughts here on this forum just in case you were wondering what on earth is safe and what you should avoid at all costs during these precious months of incubating and feeding.

Basically there are some standard ingredients that are worthy of avoidance during your pregnancy  – the reason being, there are no tests or research performed, as no pregnant woman in her right mind would offer herself as a guinea pig. 

Ingredients to Avoid:

Retinoids in all forms (Seen listed as Retinol, Retin-A, Retinoic Acid in products)

Vitamin A: Retinoids are derived from Vitamin A – so many suggest avoiding it too. Unless they come from natural sources.

BHA or Beta Hydroxy Acid

Salicylic Acid

Lactic Acid + Glycolic Acid

Dihydroxyacetone: This is the ingredient used in self tanners and again, some sources say to avoid others say its ok. But honestly, I think you can handle being “white” for 9mths, rather than risk your bub being fed these ingredients? Right?

You also need to avoid using skin care that is reactive – usually containing essential oils or other reactive ingredients. When you are pregnant you may suddenly develop the most stunning, glowing skin (not often actually) or you may experience breakouts like a teenager and hate looking in the mirror for 9mths. Hormones. Plain and simple. And stress. And worry. And binge eating on chocolate or ice cream or Maccas will do it too. Oh and deciding to buy/sell/renovate a house will do it to you as well. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

 

The Best Skin Care Products to use:

Products that are designed to work in synergy – no it isn’t a marketing ploy, it is ALWAYS best to use ONE BRAND of skin care and not chop and change. The reason? They are designed to work together to create glorious magick on and in the skin. If you can avoid it, don’t buy different products from different ranges. Choose one. Love it and stick to it.

Choose products that are deeply soothing – pregnancy can cause sensitivity all of a sudden. And if it does, it will usually last up to around 2yrs postnatal – at which time you may be having an other baby, so choose a brand that is solid, and reliable and has a proven track record.
If you happen to get angry breakouts then you may need to speak to a beauty therapist who is trained in helping skin to calm down.

Remember you still need to exfoliate, but maybe not as often, or as firmly. Exfoliation is IMPERATIVE for keeping the skin hydrated and balanced. If you have a build up of gunk and dead skin, then your moisturiser won’t sink in as easily and your make up won’t sit perfectly flat. So be sure to get a facial once per month and use a home exfoliator at least once per week. You will use less serum and moisturiser if you do this. 
Speaking of serums…..they are reaaaallllyyy important. These beauties are the healer of the skin. So you will use them most often at night, and they will go to work while you sleep (or toss and turn, or get up to go to the toilet umpteen times).

Moisturisers are necessary. As are cleansers. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you can get away with using soap and water well into your 30’s…as your “skin routine”. It won’t work, and you will be avoiding photos or mirrors from age 35 onwards if you persist in this.

Cleansers will remove make up and pollution that sits on the skin. Whilst also beginning the hydrating process. Moisturisers s go down in the layers of skin and will help store water – which will plump the skin and reduce lines and wrinkles. Soap is drying and will cause more wrinkles and decrease the quality of the skin. 

If you are really dry, then a soothing masque is a good investment to use weekly. Most people in the area of Sydney I live in are not super dry unless they are a Flight Attendant, or work in air con all the time, or sit on the beach in the sun for hours and hours each week. IF this is you, then make sure you choose your monthly self-care ritual to include a hydrating masque as part of the treatment. Otherwise, just have a monthly or quarterly facial and this will be all you need as an added hydra boost.

 

Why I choose Hydraflore:

I choose Hydraflore for my clinic and for my personal use. Nope, I’m never having a baby again (i think 3 + 2 is enough) but I can still use and enjoy this gorgeous, soothing and hydrating line of skin care. In fact my hubby and I have been using it for years because it works. And it is gentle, and doesn’t smell too girly.

The ingredients are Eco Certified and Organic – according to European standards. Which means that all ingredients must be natural origin and at least 95% must be certified organic. Very different standards to here in Australia. 
There are no silicones, or fillers that will clog the skin, or seep into deeper layers and then have to be dealt with by the liver as a toxin.

Hydraflore was created specifically for pregnant or reactive/sensitive skins, so you can be sure this range will be super gentle – yet effective for you.

Beauty Oil is the stand out product in this range, and doubles as a massage oil, facial serum and stretch mark fighter. Why wouldn’t you use this product?
I personally used this oil after I had an “age spot” removed from my forehead (I cannot believe I had an age spot at age 36yrs!) I used a dab of this oil 4 times per day, along with Hydraflore Firming serum and there is NO scarring and you cannot even see where it used to be.

Hydraflore is the real deal. Don’t be fooled by marketing, and don’t get wowzed by the scammers that are putting “organic” on their products without having the proper certifications (there are ways around this, didn’t you know?) 

For one time in your entire life, pregnancy and breastfeeding is the time you are really careful about the food and water you drink, about your exercise, about your hair dye and definitely you should be careful about your skin care too. Your skin is your biggest organ, it absorbs and filters, and so you need to make damn sure the stuff you put on it won’t make your liver work harder than it has too, or that it won’t allow toxins into the umbilical cord.